'Now I want to quit even more': Boss ignores employee's PTO request for family emergency but makes her perform other tasks

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Ben Weiss • Writer and Editor
Aug 21, 2023 2:00 PM EDT

Let's talk about the bureaucracy of requesting PTO and how it really shouldn't be a bureaucracy at all. When you sign a contract that entitles you to a certain about of time off, that should be the only bit of documentation involved in planning your personal vacation time. Other than that, you should be able to just send an email announcing that these are the days you're taking off. There should be no "requesting" process. There should be no waiting period between your request and your approval. And your boss certainly shouldn't have the power to deny your request. 
 

In this case, we have a boss who has been taking several unannounced personal days of their own, which would be totally excusable if she were respectful of her employee's time as well. But that, of course, is not the case. Her employee, who shared her story via this Reddit thread, sent an email requesting time off because of a family emergency after her aunt passed away. Not only was that email completely ignored by her boss and her two supervisors, but then her boss had the audacity to request that the employee edit a document and perform other tasks without any acknowledgment that the email has been, at the very least, received. Here is yet another example of how bosses have the tendency to forget that employment is a two-way street. We hope OP can get the heck out as fast as she can.

 

For more stories like this, here's one about an employee who was bossed around by her manager's significant other.

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  • 01
    Orange - 'ews Mail 2 B NEW
    via Brett Jordan
  • 02
    Font - My Boss and supervisors ignored my emails about needing to attend a funeral. Now I seriously want to quit. As the title says... I sent an email out over the weekend after getting news that my aunt died, that I may need to take time off next weekend to go home for her funeral. My supervisor was on vacation (but returned today), and my boss was not on vacation but they took Monday and Tuesday off.
    via u/dahliakrm26
  • 03
    Font - On Monday, my boss sends me an email asking me to edit a document for them, but didn't reply to my email. They sent another today saying they wouldn't be able to join our meeting for personal reasons, but still hasn't replied to my email. Both of my supervisors have also ignored it...
    via u/dahliakrm26
  • 04
    Font - I already have been wanting to quit this job because I am underpaid and overworked (dwindled down to a team of just me this past January) and really hate their workaholic vibes. Now I want to quit even more. So I'm going to apply to new jobs starting today. Thank you for reading my rant (if you are reading it lol)
    via u/dahliakrm26
  • 05
    Font - Linkcott18 23 hr. ago Tell them which days you will be gone, block the time off in your calendar & don't worry about it. Good luck with the job hunt. 716 Reply Share
    via u/dahliakrm26
  • 06
    Font - Nice-Fish-50 · 18 hr. ago Yup. Just like the boss did. Don't say "My aunt died". Say "I'm taking X time for personal reasons", then just do it. They didn't object. That's good enough. Put it on the calendar. If they fire you, well, you were already looking anyhow. 156 Reply Share
    via u/dahliakrm26
  • 07
    Font - unicorn8dragon. 14 hr. ago Some companies have leave specifically for bereavement so maybe double check you aren't forfeiting the that time or related things. Sorry for your loss OP 49 Reply Share
    via u/dahliakrm26
  • 08
    Font - techramblings 22 hr. ago Once you know the funeral date, inform them that you will be away from the office on date <x> for a family funeral. You are not asking for permission, you are letting them know you won't be there as a courtesy. End of story. What they choose to do with that is up to them. 234 Reply Share
    via u/dahliakrm26
  • 09
    Font - Icy-Imwithyouguys 22 hr. ago Sorry for your loss OP. The mistake was asking when you should just be advising that you're taking the day/ weekend off to attend a family member funeral.
    via u/dahliakrm26
  • 10
    Font - Far_Adeptness_3360. 23 hr. ago Id ignore the their emails and just reiterate the fact that out of youre not going to be there next weekend.
    via u/dahliakrm26
  • 11
    Font - dahliakrm26 OP. 11 hr. ago I haven't been ignoring them unfortunately but I was very blunt in all my replies today
    via u/dahliakrm26
  • 12
    Font - Pojol 15 hr. ago Don't quit. Never quit. Be fired, so you can get unemployment.
    via u/dahliakrm26
  • 13
    Font - dahliakrm26 OP. 11 hr. ago This literally made me laugh out loud, thank you for that idk if unemployment would be enough for me to support myself rn, so I'd rather have something lined up before I quit or if am (god forbid) frd
    via u/dahliakrm26
  • 14
    Font - Someidiot666-1- 21 hr. ago Go to hr and tell them you have a family emergency. other those
    via u/dahliakrm26
  • 15
    Font - almightykingbob - 20 hr. ago OP despite the title of your post, your story makes it sound like you only sent one email to your boss and supervisor with your request. Did you do anything to follow up on your request? Given timelines for when each was out of the office it seems probable that your request simply got buried in their inboxs. That said, it sounds like beside this incident you are already feeling overworked and underpaid, so i would still encourage you to look for a better job.
    via u/dahliakrm26
  • 16
    Font - Xerit 18 hr. ago Just go, if they call you tell them you gave them notice. What are they gonna do? Fire you from a job you are apparently looking to quit? For what cause?
    via u/dahliakrm26
  • 17
    Font - Darkchick3n 18 hr. ago . Sorry for your loss. Its on them to read their email. Go to the ceremony no matter what
    via u/dahliakrm26
  • 18
    Font - OTU Figerally 15 hr. ago Well, since they aren't addressing it you should just assume that they have acknowledged that you won't be available that weekend. Make sure to temporarily block their numbers in case they forget and try to contact you.
    via u/dahliakrm26
  • 19
    Font - Lord Kaylon 14 hr. ago Sounds like one of those corporate cultures where the boss tells the employee "I'm not obligated to reply to your emails, however you absolutely are required to respond to mine".
    via u/dahliakrm26

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boss workplace-stories work stories toxic-workplace job work toxic-boss Horrible Bosses reddit thread Reddit toxic-work-environment
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